ive just finished a lot of my assignments for the week thus i can afford to write a little something for this page. it’s such a guilt trip to be doing so much extra-curricular work to write for other stuff when what youre supposed to really do is not yet done. im not making sense. ill start over.
finally i found time to update you on some news about me. i just finished my cancer awareness project for editorial design and it’s such a relief. ive been struggling with that assignment, my work was eternally not good enough thus my professor just kept disapproving it. i wanted to understand what he wanted to see from my work and everytime i thought i got it, there was always another thing. we just didnt meet on the same level and it frustrated me. eventually of course we met and agreed on something and i got a pretty good grade for it. though the grade is important to me, the work and effort i put on my work is worth much more. sometimes i dont pass assignments on time, and risking getting the deduction for it, just because im not happy with my work. im happier with a really nice plate and a low grade than an ok plate with an ok grade. and of course at times i just dont make anything good. =)
im also getting pretty busy with preparations for this film project we have to do for our electronic media class. my group mates mike, jojo, marco and b3 and i are still working out a lot of kinks in pre-prod. i made a script and did the story treatment out of jojo’s concept and i think it’s coming out pretty well. one problem though, it’s hard to whip up dialogue. especially since it has to be in filipino! i never thought it could be that hard. anyway, we’re still trying to get pen medina to play the tatay role for this film. i actually texted him yesterday but up to now, he hasnt replied back. bad sign? im just hoping he ran out of credit. we will still have to consult with my professor but if in two day’s time we dont find him, i go to next actor on the list: gammy viray. him i know may be well in reach and might actually work with us. his wife is ama quiambao and is my first choice for playing nanay in the film. at least this way, we get them both in a film, and i guess that’s cool. are we being too ambitious in this project? i do think that you reach for the stars but keep your feet planted on the ground. if i dont get all these great actors then perhaps i can move on to lesser players. unfortunately i still dont have a plan B. what happens if i dont get them good actors? i dont want to think about it.
in the meantime let me share some poems i did years back. the math poem i did while sitting out a calculus exam (probably) that i flunked (expectedly). you see, since i couldnt find a way to answer them problems, i was thinking what i waste of space it is if i pass in an almost empty blue book. solution? write. i wrote a lot of poems and short essays in math exams. unfortunately these are all i kept. so here it is, the math poem (click on the link down below)! the other poem is one i did while trying out the typewriter i brought here from home. wanting to feel more of a writer, i lugged around that heavy piece of machinery on the boat and through the journey to katipunan. years later since i never really got to use it, it started to rust and i was actually saddened by that. anyhu i wrote some interesting pieces with it and here’s one of them. i hope i could put in the other stuff i wrote with that. actually that period of my life was when i was most angsty. this poem, staring into you, is the non-angsty thing i did when i was ‘angsty.’ i guess im using the term too much but just for kicks, here’s another coming your way: angsty! read on!
math exam poem
staring into you
ps. got news from my professor. just now i was text-conferencing with him (cesar hernando, production designer in batang west side) and he suggested that if we cant get pen medina perhaps we could try ricky davao. i was pretty excited with the idea of working with the actor. then if ever we get ricky davao, ama quiambao is definitely too “mature” for him as a wife so we have to get somebody of ricky’s age. sabi ni sir hernando baka si jacklyn jose nalang daw. he’ll try to get in contact with their managers tomorrow. i was kinda worried anton might be too young for them. the only solution was to make anton younger than he really is, perhaps make him a highschool student. besides he looks pretty young for his age, 20, and he is not that tall besides. i guess he’d be a perfect troubled highschooler! this would really be a good experience for all of us. so i guess it’s back to work, gotta make the script much better than it is today. the prospects of making this film is getting scarier and challenging everyday! the good Lord help us all. =)
benjamin padero 