two days ago manila was hit by the worst storm in 11 years. and i had to be at the office at the time. edsa was practically deserted. the office was turning into a jungle right before my eyes. walked out at 3 and decided to take a hike from mandaluyong to cubao. walk therapy.

when i got to araneta center, decided to stop killing myself and took the bus to philcoa. forgot to get off from too much thinking about too much thinking and missed my stop. got off vanguard instead and despite legs hurting had to walk across devasted UP to get to vinzons. no jeep in sight. at katipunan only resto open were jollibee and shakeys. had to wait in line for hours. thankful for dinner at joven’s with tatems. laid down but couldnt sleep from thinking too much about thinking too much.

lights came back at 11pm and tried getting online in vain. slept again and took temporary solace listening to sad love songs from elton john’s aida.

“sometimes in my darkest thoughts,
I wish I’d never learned/
what it is to be in love
and have that love returned”